June 24 = Melt Mommy's Heart Day

People often ask me which of my two pregnancies has been harder.  It's a tough question to answer.  Liam's pregnancy was full of tests and monitoring and bed rest.  I thought it was normal to get blood drawn during every appointment.  However, when I was pregnant with Liam, Liam was the only thing I had to concentrate on.  Every Tuesday, I would get TheBump.com telling me what fruit he was the same size as and I would read about his developing fingernails or growing hair.  When people would ask me how far along I was, I would annoyingly reply with the number of weeks and days.  With Malia, I know when the due date is and that's usually what I cite as an answer and I make that person figure it out because my pregnancy brain prevents me from doing so.  With this pregnancy, I've had blood drawn twice- once at the beginning for baseline labs and once because I asked for it.  Oh- three times- I forgot about the glucose tolerance test because unlike with Liam, with Malia, I passed the first time and didn't have to endure the second, four hour, four blood draws test.  At this point in my pregnancy with Liam, I was driving 45 minutes at least once a week to get a non-stress test.  This was supposed to be a 20 minute test where they hooked me up, watched non-existent contractions and let me go.  It always turned into a 6+ hour test where they hooked me up, watched crazy looking contractions that I couldn't feel and didn't let me eat just in case they had to do an emergency c-section.  And Zachary was gone.  I'd ask the nurses to please let me know if/when it was appropriate to let my husband know- thank goodness it never came down to that but there were so many anxiety producing times.  With Malia we had two scares- the first was when her heart rate was really low, really early in the pregnancy.  The doctor told me at the next appointment, after her heart rate had risen significantly, that she didn't expect to find a heart beat at all that appointment.  The other scare came halfway through the pregnancy when she was measuring at the 8th percentile but that was resolved too- she's now above the 30th.  Other than that, I go in, they listen to the heart rate, measure my belly, ask if I have any questions and send me on my way.  So in that regard, this pregnancy has been easier, hands-down.  On the other hand- being pregnant while chasing a toddler has been a real challenge.  At this point in Liam's pregnancy, I was on bed rest.  Now, I'm carrying Liam to and from the car.  I'm lifting him up on the changing table, squeezing my belly against his crib to bend down to get him out, squatting down while holding Liam to pick up whatever he's dropped on the floor, doing twice as much laundry, dishes and picking up 10 times as much stuff.  It's rough.  This is all to tell you about how Liam melted my heart today.  I was picking up puzzle pieces from the floor and putting them in the right places.  Bending over hurts so bad so I just decided to sit down halfway through.  When I finished putting the puzzle back together, I didn't get up right away.  It's hard to get up sometimes.  Liam was in the kitchen where I could see him and he was entertaining himself playing with a Hess Helicopter his Uncle Matt gave him for Christmas so I gave myself a few minutes of just sitting in the middle of the hallway.  Liam looked up and saw me; I smiled at him.  He got up, brought over the helicopter, sat two feet away from me and went back to playing.  Now a lot of mommies have boys who come up and hug them all the time or want to be in their laps... Liam is not one of them.  So for him to voluntarily come and sit next to me to play, made my day, my week, my life.

I got up and got my phone so I could take this picture to always remember how sweet he was and he sat there for a few more minutes.  Eventually he got up to find something else to play with but he had done his good deed of the day.  And then 10 minutes later- my husband comes home with these!

I asked, "Awwwww, what are these for?!" and he said they were for being such a "good little wifey."

Note to self: Read this on a bad day and remember you are loved.