Today started as every Saturday should- with Chickfila breakfast- as I was getting Malia ready and Kayleigh's stuff packed for our morning outing, Zachary got this picture:
Also... here's a fun guessing game- who's this?
Answer:
Our last chickfila breakfast for a while...
While we were at breakfast, Zachary told me I should go to Mount Vernon by myself. I've been wanting to go since... well, since Zachary and I took a DC trip for our second wedding anniversary. It was on the list of things to do but we decided to go see Matthew, who happened to be in Quantico that weekend, instead. It was a good trade but Mount Vernon stayed on my list of things I wanted to do at some point. I thought for sure we'd make it during our stay in Annapolis but with just days left, it didn't look like it was going to happen but my sweet husband stepped in. I decided to take Miss Malia with me to keep me company :)
She's got her ticket in her hand- others had dropped their tickets and it was her mission to pick them up and collect as many as possible.
We got to the line to go tour the mansion early- shocking- so we walked around the gardens. Malia loves flowers so much so she was in heaven!
As you can probably tell from the pictures, it was kind of hot. We sat to rest for a little while before getting in the line- Malia approved.
You aren't allowed to take pictures in the mansion but when we came out, this was our view. The camera doesn't do it justice but just looking at the picture reminds me of how beautiful it was.
Malia was nearing her patience limit but I pushed her to walk to the tomb anyway as it was on the way to the shuttle that would take us back near our car. Malia was not very cooperative so I snapped this picture really quickly and we walked toward the shuttle.
This is what being at her patience limit looks like:
She was happy to get on the bus though- here's some of her tickets she picked up along the way.
I had to stop by the gift shop- I wanted to find something for Zachary- I found some wine for us to share. Malia loved these puppies and wanted three of them "because they're friends."
This was exactly two months ago so I'm so glad I took this screenshot of funny things that happened on our trip. I'm not sure what "I'm back- it's my turn not yours" is but I do remember us being on the shuttle and Malia was climbing all over me and I said, "Girl, you're killing me" and she said "I'm not killing you, I'm just sitting." She also said, "Get off the bus, I don't like you." I started to pretend cry and she said "I sorry mommy, I love you." So that was nice... and then on the way home she started singing "I like to eat, eat, eat chicken and fries" to the tune of apples and bananas.
This was the longest I had been away from Kayleigh since we got home from the hospital- I missed her so!
Zachary has duty tomorrow so we're celebrating Mother's Day today. We have a bit of a tradition that we do something outside on Mother's Day- it's been a picnic for the last few years but Zachary went to a marathon with the USNA marathon team recently and thought I would love to go where they were. However, he chose a different park on the same river so it would be somewhere he hadn't already seen so we could experience something new together! As part of my morning routine, I looked at my facebook feed and saw this and while Liam doesn't have Autism, I can relate to this. It says "Being an Autism parent is like flying one of these for the first time without a manual in the dark while all the passengers are telling you what you are doing wrong."
The first part of my special day my sweet husband planned for me was getting chickfila for breakfast. As a bonus, we went inside instead of just going through the drive thru. I prefer eating inside because it's less of a mess and it's just easier for the kids. So we went inside and the kids went straight to the play area. Zachary went to order and at first it was going really well. Then a mom came in with her two kids. One was probably a little younger than Liam and the other was probably 6 or so. The older one looked panicked when he saw there were other kids in the play area and he quietly said something to the younger one along the lines of "behave." After a few minutes I could tell the mom had her hands full with the younger one. There is no judgment in that statement because I have my hands full with my older one. He was really loud and wanted to do what he wanted to do when he wanted to do it- again, just like Liam. The older brother kept trying to keep him in check and was stressing himself out and the mom looked at me a few times like she was going to say something but decided against it. As I thought in my head about what I wanted to say, the mom decided to take the kids and leave- a decision I make pretty often. So I didn't get a chance to say this but this is what I wanted to say: I get it. You don't have to explain this to me. I am a safe place. The fact that you got both of your kids dressed, not to mention yourself- you look really cute by the way- is an accomplishment. The fact that you talked yourself into bringing them somewhere where they could eat yummy food and play is impressive. Especially when you're the only adult available, it's a lot easier to stay at home. So good for you. You can let him scream as loud as he wants- the people outside of this well insulated room can't hear us and he's not bothering me. At this moment, I'm thankful my kid's not screaming but I can handle it if yours does. Thank you for being real- for letting that face of exasperation show through instead of pretending this is the first time this has ever happened and where did he learn this?? I've worn the same face a lot. And I know it's usually met with superior, "thank God that's not me" smirks or straight up, "get a handle on your kid lady" glares. But keep up the fight. One day, you'll go to Chickfila and you'll get through breakfast and playtime and it'll be easier. I'm not there yet either but I hold out hope it'll happen. It feels like it's not worth it but each time you take him, you tell him you believe in him, you love him and you want what's best for him. And each time you leave carrying a screaming, flailing child out to the car and you still believe in him, love him and want what's best for him, you're proving you're an amazing mom.
The only constructive thing I've had someone say to me in one of these times was someone who said, "God gives special needs kids to special moms." In this day and age, everyone's so worried about being politically correct. That was a brave thing to say- what if I didn't accept my child had special needs- I could have been offended. That's probably why I didn't say anything- out of fear of how she'd react. It's sad really. I really just wanted to encourage her and tell her I can empathize but you just never know so I kept my mouth shut. And right after she left, our food was ready, and so Malia and I went down and sat with Zachary right outside the play area where we could easily see Liam and he could continue to play. After about ten minutes, a lot of kids came in and started playing and Liam lost control over the room and he didn't like that. A mom opened the door for him thinking she was helping him out but he had a breakdown because he likes to be the one opening the door. Poor woman- she had no clue what she did wrong. Welcome to the club. So I ended up taking Liam to the car and having him eat his breakfast in the car while Malia and Zachary finished up. Too bad the mom from earlier didn't stick around and see my kid have a meltdown- maybe it would have made her feel better! So we left from there to Great Falls Park on the Potomac River. We had such an awesome time- it was beautiful and my kids just love being outside so they were content as could be! Liam hopped off the stroller a couple of times because he wanted to walk but for the most part they loved it and were super cooperative!
Today was Sunday and I didn't ask for this but Zachary took charge today of pretty much everything. I found this:
... but Zachary cleaned it up and this is what my afternoon looked like- potato skins (made by my husband) and a new puzzle!
I came so close to finishing the puzzle but wanted to spend some time with Zachary before the night was over so forfeited... Hopefully I'll finish it tomorrow!
Today is Tuesday which means Zachary has class and doesn't get home until 9:00. I had the kids downstairs and was working on some laundry and doing some stuff on the computer. Liam was going in and out of the downstairs room- he loves opening and closing the door. Well one time he was going out, he fell and hit his head on the floor. I went to comfort him and noticed there was a lot of water on the floor. I had been sitting ten feet away from the washer and didn't even notice it was overflowing. I turned the washer off and started getting things off the floor because the water was spreading fast. I got the kids upstairs and called maintenance and they said they were sending someone. I was trying to get in touch with Zachary but he was in a meeting and didn't have his phone on him. Thankfully the lady said the maintenance people would come that night and help us out. Zachary called and I told him what was going on and said, "I was about to ask you to come home but..." and then he started talking about something- I thought he hadn't heard me at all so I didn't finish by saying "...since the maintenance people are coming, I'll be fine." Well, he went back to his office and emailed his professor explaining what happened and assured him he'd get a makeup assignment in soon. He called me on his way home and I told him to turn around- that we'd be fine! It took some convincing but he went back and then, miraculously, the professor let the class out early! Thank goodness he went because he ended up getting home 30 minutes later than he would have had he skipped class but now he didn't have a makeup assignment to do! Couldn't have gone better!
While the maintenance people worked on tearing up the carpet and removing the padding and putting fans and dehumidifiers downstairs, Liam, Malia and I played in Liam's room. Malia found Mr. Potato Head's glasses and decided they were for her.
Also I saw this quote today and it is very true. And I wouldn't trade parenting for all the nice things in the world. The snuggling totally makes it worth it.
Well whatever happened in yoga was just a precursor. I woke up this morning and felt awful. I muddled through getting ready, got Liam to the CDC and even went grocery shopping but when I got home I immediately put poor Malia down for a nap and laid down myself. Over the next hour I woke up six times alternating between sweating and shivering. I texted Zachary and he suggested I see if Liam could stay at the CDC for a little longer so that he could pick him up. So I called and thankfully it worked out. Soon after Malia got up from her nap, Zachary came home and got her and picked up Liam. This was my sweet girl between nap and when Zachary got home:
When he came home from getting Liam he had chicken noodle soup, crackers, lemonade and twix bars. He said the soup was for when I was shivering and the lemonade was for when I was sweating. So thoughtful! Oh! And he got me a card! It said "Sending happy thoughts... and get well wishes." And he signed it "Thank you for always taking care of us. We hope you feel better and we love you." How sweet! So he handled everything for the whole night and as we were going to sleep I said thank you for taking care of the kids today and he said, "thank you for taking care of everything every day." I hate that I was sick but it felt really good to be so appreciated!
Oh little Miss Malia. Every night she hates going to bed. But last night was exceptionally rough. We tried to let her cry it out but she was so very angry- it was such a different cry- that I couldn't leave her in there. Zachary got her out of the crib and that made her happy but she could sense when he even thought about putting her back and started screaming. Zachary's patience goes a little quicker than mine so I went in for reinforcements. I started rocking her and she was pretty happy with that. When I started rocking her, the fifth song of her "Guitar for Stress Relief." When we got to the end of the last track, the fourteenth, she had been lifting her head up with her eyes closed, turning her head, and putting it back down. She was asleep. So I decided to try to put her down. Nope. Sat back down and tried again. Got back to the fifth song and decided to try something different. I thought we could go back to our co-sleeping days so I took her downstairs and tried to see if I could fall asleep in the recliner. I'm a picky sleeper and I could tell immediately this wasn't going to work but it led me to my next idea- I thought I would try to get her to fall asleep on the floor of her room and then I could sneak out. I took my sleepy little lady upstairs, got a blanket out and spread it on the floor, put her on it and waited for the magic to happen. Nope again. She came alive. She wanted to play with everything on the changing table and just thought everything was so funny. I decided to grab a glass of water so I put her in her crib and turned the light on for her and when I came back to rejoin this party of two I heard nothing coming from her room. I waited for a few seconds... still nothing. Apparently all she wanted was a light on. So I finally got to go to sleep. We don't have an alarm clock in our room- thanks iPhone!- so I didn't see what time it was when I finally got to sleep but I know it was late. So this morning I woke up at 7:00 and couldn't go back to sleep. Instead of wasting time just laying there, I decided to go downstairs and make breakfast for my perfect sleeping family. The smell woke Zachary up and so we got the kids dressed and ready for the day and had some taters 'n' eggs. Then the fatigue hit. I asked Zachary if he minded if I grabbed a nap and he encouraged me to do so. Fast forward- I wake up and come downstairs to a completely clean house. The dishes are done, the toys are picked up, the counters are cleaned- everything! It was amazing. And getting out of a round of dishes made up for the late night!
Malia is so sweet and loves being around her people. I think she's going to grow into a very helpful young lady- I can envision her helping me clean and cook or at least keeping me company.
She got kind of bored with the spoon so she took up some light reading.
And here was the finished product- chicken marinated in Italian dressing, squash and zucchini and a new favorite of ours- gnocchi (which is pronounced gnaw-key according to the box).
